Leapfrog has always been considered a kids’ game — a fun and silly physical activity. But it’s also been used to describe circumventing steps in a process in order to arrive at an end result more quickly. At times, it’s an appropriate, efficient, and effective move. Then there are the times when all it does is escalate a tenuous situation into something dangerous and even murderous.
What we’re seeing in today’s America is a stressed-out, anxious, burned-out, fearful, disappointed, frustrated, and angry population. The list of what’s making us so uptight is very long. It’s also pervasive and unrelenting, with no clear answers, easy solutions, or light at the end of the tunnel in sight.
Most people are unconscious of the fact that all of this is taking a toll on their mental and emotional well-being and physical health, as well as their attitude and outlook about our country and life in general. Equally, they have no idea how to effectively and healthfully deal with the impact of their distress on themselves and the people around them.
Hence, what we’re seeing more and more is people primed to dispense with their usual decision-making process and immediately opt to respond with anger. Anger, as we all know, overrides all other emotions in a fraction of a second. It’s like a light switch being flipped on. Suddenly, all reasoning evaporates into a pumped-up ego stuck in fight mode — forget about flight or freeze.
Now the progression is about survival, being right, and winning. And here’s where the “Demise of Decision Making” comes into play: With approximately 398.5 million firearms owned by Americans in 2025 and in 2023, a total of 512 million guns produced for the US market, a gun quickly becomes the judge and jury in an altercation because it’s the ultimate threat that can ensure “winning.”
- In 2024, over 30,000 people died from gun-related injuries.
- Since January of 2025, there have been approximately 200 reported mass shootings in the US, with 165 people killed and 897 injured.
- Annually, around 10 million people experience domestic violence in the US.
So, violence as a means to enact a “solution” is endemic in the US, with new reports coming in every day. What this says is that, generally, many people are foregoing not only a basic decision-making process, but the use of any critical thinking. The irony of “critical” thinking is that it’s ignored during “critical” situations. Here’s the usual decision-making process:
- Identify what decision needs to be made
- Gather relevant information
- Identify alternative solutions
- Weigh the evidence
- Make a choice from the alternatives
- Take appropriate action
- Review the decision made and its consequences
Of the steps above, #1 and 2 are addressed but only superficially. None of the other steps are considered. Instead, one’s suppressed — and often unconscious — anger, anxiety, frustration, and fear are immediately triggered, exploding on a scale from 1 to 100 in a nanosecond. The need to defend one’s position, status, manhood, vanity, and virility — whether male or female — is set off like an autonomic response and the clash is on. Now, nothing else matters, only “coming out the victor!”
What triggers an angry reaction can be as little as being clumsy, to another’s rudeness, to outright being attacked.
- Fifty percent of drivers respond to the careless acts of other drivers with aggressive behavior themselves.
- There’s been a 500% increase in reported cases of road rage over the last ten years, with thirty murders annually linked to road rage.
- The FBI reports that a violent crime occurs on average every 25.9 seconds.
- 75% of US adults feel that violence and crime are significant sources of stress.
- About 34% of adults report feeling that stress is completely overwhelming for them on most days.
- And finally, a Gallup poll comparing stress throughout the world found that the US has one of the highest percentages of stress in its citizens: 53%
We are so tightly wound up that the slightest incident can make us launch into a tirade. What’s unfortunate is that so many of the conflicts occurring in our backyard and throughout our country have ended badly and have caused trauma to untold numbers of people. The fact is that we are experiencing a world of hurt on so many levels that it seems any attempts are fruitless because nothing appears to be changing, only getting worse. Compounding that is the fact that non-stop negativity and pain hit us in the face every single day like a dump truck unloading its trash.
So, it really comes down to each individual learning how to effectively alleviate the stressors and anxiety in their life, to manage their expectations, and seek positive support. We each need to be mindful of what we’re focusing on and whether that’s uplifting and enlivening or just the opposite. There is so much noise and distraction in our lives today that we need to become more discerning about what we let into our minds, hearts, and lives.
Some of the easiest ways to let go of stress involve things you’re already aware of, so here’s a little encouragement to start them or do them more often:
- Listen to relaxing music
- Get out in nature
- Go to art galleries and museums
- Take up an enjoyable hobby
- Join a book club
- Take various classes to expand your knowledge
- Work with the elderly in a senior care home
- Teach something you really enjoy
- Do some things you’ve been putting off that bring you joy
- Spend more time with family and friends
- Take yoga, Tai Chi, or a dance class
- Watch movies that inspire and uplift you
- Go see theater productions with friends
- Start that book you’ve always wanted to write
- Go to the gym more regularly
- Explore your town, state, and the US
- Learn to meditate and do deep breathing exercises
- Attend spiritual discussions/workshops
- Watch sunrises/sunsets and meteor showers
- Help out at a shelter for the unhoused or a soup kitchen
And there’s so much more you could do for yourself. One thing not mentioned in the prior list is working with a trained therapist or attending a support group. Both can be extremely helpful in assisting you to 1) unload and release your anxiety and stress, 2) gain a better perspective on your life and the world around you, 3) learn more about yourself and the “why” behind your stress, anxiety, anger, and fear, and 4) develop techniques and skills that will help you stay centered and balanced in any situation.
The fact is that the world isn’t going to change, and people aren’t going to change because you want them to. You can’t change anyone but yourself. Only you can decide what to let into your life and thus be in charge of your life.
Yes, the world is going to come at you in some insidious and pervasive way, trying to get your attention and suck you into all its drama. That can’t happen if you are in charge of your life.
Deepak Chopra urges us on with “Every time you are tempted to react in the same old way, ask yourself if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future.”
So that brings us back to our primary theme of leapfrogging, which, at the beginning of this article, it was said that we leapfrog over all sorts of things. That includes leapfrogging over our decision-making process — mothballing our critical thinking — which can cause a lot of upset and aggravated conflict. But it’s our calm critical thinking that’s going to save us from ourselves.
When it comes to our hearts, our inner being, and who we truly are, it’s not all the anxiety, fear, anger, frustration, insecurities, and stress pushing us to react, usually inappropriately. We’re greater than that, stronger than that, more resilient and creative than that. The leapfrogging we’re seeing going on around us is not helping, only exacerbating tense situations. We don’t need to include ourselves in that.
Getting back to thoughtful reasoning will help us stay out of conflict, as well as keep us more even-keeled emotionally and, ultimately, sane. Let’s avoid leapfrogging and choose a better, wiser approach to life. As Maya Angelou said, “If you are going down a road and don’t like what’s in front of you, and look behind you and don’t like what you see, get off the road. Create a new path!”
