WOMEN BEHAVING BADLY

Since 1948, there’s been a growing television trend that’s become immensely popular. It began with one reality TV show, Candid Camera, and we now have hundreds ranging from talent and game/talent shows to fly-on-the-wall documentaries, hidden camera, celebrity, and professional lives, talk shows, live events and hoaxes, supernatural and paranormal, risk-taking, sports, fortune-hunting, renovation, dating and relationships, and social experiment shows.

The programs that seem to have the greatest effect on American society are those involving people in varying types of relationships. The entertainment component of the shows is found in everything you’d expect in a soap opera. The difference is that real people, not actors, are the characters driving the situations and events — and the more friction and drama that can be created, the higher the shows’ ratings and entertainment “value.”

Speaking of value, let’s not forget that money and fame are the carrots being dangled in front of participants. That means: the more you act out and cause upset, the greater the possibility you’ll become a reality TV star, the more fame you’ll derive, and the more money you may garner. It doesn’t matter whether you’re the hero or villain, winner or loser. It’s fame, baby!

The byproduct of these shows is that what we’re seeing reflected more and more in general society is people behaving very badly — and they don’t care because it gets them noticed, they’re rewarded with applause, get adulation, and/or they get their way. In the process, people are treated more horribly than you can imagine, defensiveness and below-the-belt attacks become the norm, and emotionally blackmailing others is a primary tactic to get the upper hand over others.

What this shows the world is just how far people are willing to go to win, be right, cool, powerful, stand out, influence — all in order to be somebody. And it doesn’t matter how abusive, depraved, disrespectful, dishonest, demeaning, disruptive, and dehumanizing you are. Basically, it’s the height of selfishness and egotism.

Unfortunately, this is what so many people are aspiring to and accepting as a baseline for human interactions. There are two negative consequences to this:

· Displaying zero self-respect and allowing ourselves to sink into ever-lower levels of consciousness and animalistic behavior, and

· Teaching the viewing audience that it’s okay to act out in real life to get what you want no matter what it does to you, what it costs you, and the effect it has on others.

This is what we’re calling “entertainment” today. The entire focus is on drama, upset, secrets and revelations, backstabbing, manipulation, revenge, larger-than-life personalities, and, absurdly, the possibility of finding “true” love. What is missing is any level of maturity. Instead, we’re purposely choosing to spiral downward on the evolutionary scale and sinking into the oblivion of unchecked anger, lust, greed, and vanity.

The truly amazing thing is that we’re seeing this occur in all areas and at all levels of society. And, for the purposes of this month’s issue, women seem to be competing with men to see who can talk the trashiest, who can behave the most outrageously, and who can win the battle of a flamboyant beatdown? Dignity does not exist for these women as they lower themselves into ever-greater displays of titillation, risqué and raunchy behavior, and mindless and irrational escapades.

What so many women — of all ages — fail to see is that these reality TV shows are seeping into their psyches to the degree that they’re unable to remain objective about themselves, human nature, entertainment, self-esteem, and self-worth. Thus, they unconsciously incorporate these behaviors, perspectives, and “values” into their own personalities and interactions.

The truth about reality TV shows is that they:

· Create a false image of life

· Present skewed understandings and perceptions

· Distort youth mentality

· Exploit people and situations

· Erode ethical and moral practices

· Feature humiliation and shame as entertainment

· Promote aggressive behavior and hyper-defensiveness

· Lower our compassion quotient

· Up our abusiveness quotient

· Exacerbate personality issues and mental aberrations

· Promote and validate voyeurism

· Encourage ever-lower standards of behavior and decorum

· Foster deceit, gossip, manipulation, fabrication, and exaggeration

· Urge playing games with others’ emotions, situations, and vulnerabilities

The question we must ask ourselves is: Why are we so attracted to the reality TV genre? It equates with rubbernecking accidents. For television viewers, this voyeurism is essentially watching a progression of human train wrecks.

The three most important components of all relationships are dignity, respect, and trust. None of those are achievable unless we have respect for ourselves, unconditionally respect others, choose to carry ourselves with dignity and grace, and desire to establish trust as a means of elevating and inspiring each other. Yes, life is going to serve up all sorts of challenging people and situations — but we don’t have to become hostage to them.

The primary determination we must keep in mind is whether lowering our behavior, words, and actions is serving our highest good. ●